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Huh, if that is any indication of how the rest of my life is going to go, this is not a good sign. :) I am feeling tired today. No good reason to be tired yet I am.

I have a lot I could be doing but am I doing it? No, I am sitting here typing to no one about nothingness. Ah, why can’t I get motivated to do anything? It is just gorgeous outside. A perfect day, not too hot not too cold. A perfect day to be outside doing something, anything.

I sit here thinking for no reason. Am I avoiding something? Well yes come to think of it I am. I need to pay my bills. I have no idea why I procrastinate so much about paying my bills. It is not like I don’t have the money to pay them. I just don’t feel like taking the actual steps to sit down and pay them. The stupid thing is it isn’t hard. Heck most of them I could pay on line in a matter of minutes but I always put them off and then every day I think, “I should pay those” and I get a little bit of a sick feeling in my stomach. I could pay the the moment they come in, yet I torture myself for weeks dreading paying them, thinking about them and not paying them until the last minute, then worrying about them being late.

I procrastinate a lot on a lot of things, I have no idea why I do this and I often think, “I am going to stop procrastinating” of course that lasts for about a second or two and then I procrastinate on procrastinating.

Why would a sane person torture themselves in this way?